Making Plans

I've always thought that I not really a 'making plans' type person. I'm more of a 'sure that sounds good', 'I think that this what I should do', type person. I'm not really an 'A' type personality. I just too laid back most of the time. But I have realized that I do make plans, I make them all the time. I'm going to Boston in May, already basically planned out, tickets bought. I was annoying my mother for weeks before the decision on whether we were going or not. I might not know the plan for the rest of the weekend (I'm really ok with that), but I have planned basically to not have a plan. And I know that there will be some structure that weekend, I'm just not the person in charge of planning that structure.

Planning I guess is a good thing. The problem is when I plan without seeking God first. I tend to forget (willfully) that He is a part of everything I do, because He is a part of everything. It more like I'm telling God what I'm doing.

Take my dreams. These are not set in stone plans, but they are hopes. Like I'd like to get married and have kids. I have one friend who had a plan to be married at 25, kids by 27... I could never be that defined. But I do dream. Grant it some of my dreams are crazy and unlikely,like winning a Olympic medal or becoming a world renowned playwright (still hoping for that one). But I don't let God in on my dreams and hopes either. I keep finding these places in my life were I've basically told God he's not allowed. We always talk about God closing doors and windows, but maybe its not God, maybe its ourselves.

Last night the bible study I'm a part of took a good amount of time talking about our plans and our pride. We're studying James, just finished chapter 4. We actually read a verse that always makes me think of Shakespeare, 'You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes' (James 4:14b). I always figure the Bard stole from James for MacBeth's line 'Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more.'

So to get back to my plans. My plans are not really mine and more importantly, they are Gods.