Saying Goodbye

I remember walking into brightly lit room
Every lamp was on, everything so bright
Except the windows, the windows shone night
Through the empty chairs and potted plants
Past the many pictures in old frames
Through the legs of relatives I hardly remember
But they all know me, they all know me.

There are tears in the eyes of my father
He is hiding them badly, my mother
my mother has been crying, but now
now her eyes are simply red and puffy
We walk forward, my sister in my fathers arms
Forward past the relatives I don't know
Toward the coffin, flowers encircling
I'm just tall enough to look inside

There she lays my grandmother
her skin is very white, its very odd
Her eyes are closed, she could be sleeping
Yet I know that she is not.
I remember the story of sleeping beauty
I wonder if all she needs is a kiss
Her hands are clasped at her chest
I remember them hold my own
I remember the corn chowder
watching wheel of fortune after school
I remember her smell, her smile
I remember, barely

"You can touch her." my mother whispers
I do tentatively. I bring back my hand quickly
She is cold, too cold, too weird, dead
The word has a meaning, a strong one.
I begin to understand, barely
I want to leave, I hate crying in public
My mother is talking with family
My father has finally broken down
He screws up his face, crying hard
I cry, whenever my father does,
and thus tears form in my eyes
they run down my cheeks.

I remember, barely that day
And her I remember slightly
I wish that I could remember more
Wish I could have know her better
Wish I could have said Goodbye.