I started thinking about the path that I am currently on. I think it started last night, when I sitting at the read through of the next piece I am working on. And it continued today while emailing a friend. One of my favorite authors, C. S. Lewis is the man to go to when you need thought provoking and sometimes rather problematic quotes. One of my favorites deals rather well with this thought. "The safest road to hell is the gradual one - the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts." It is all easy.
That's the problem. The 'high' road which so many strive for, is more difficult to stay on that a balancing beam. Its rather easy to get off track. If you have done any hiking you know that going down hill can me the most dangerous part, definably if it is rather steep. We are not talking about that kind of down hill, we are talking about the slight incline, which makes it really easy to get down hill, because you almost don't realize you are going down hill. By the time you have gotten down the hill, not only have you come farther than you wanted too, but you also turn around and see the height from which you have descended. If you had not realized your mistake you would have kept on marching on, but know you see, the only problem is what do you do?
Going up hill is hard, whether it is a slight incline or a steep cliff. Not only is it physically twice if not three times as hard as going downwards over the same distance, it is mentally hard. Your mind sees ahead, knows how easy it is to go down, and wonders what in the world you are thinking. Why go up if it is easier to go down? If you do finally reach that untouchable heights, it is very possible and more than likely that you will fall off that balancing beam again. Why even move? Why not just sit down right at the middle of that beam? Why not just add another road block or bump for others to go over or around?
So why try? Lewis again gives a good bit: "We all want progress, but if you're on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive." We must try for that height, try for that 'right' road, the 'high' ground. "Aim at heaven" Lewis says "And you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither." Human nature might make it seem impossible, but it is not through ourselves that we overcome such things. But than again, when have we ever been able to do anything by ourselves with out messing it all up?
So where does all of the above leave me? Some where on the climb back towards what ever goal I started with, even if I wonder what that goal is at times. Progress for me is going backwards.
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